Open me

Back home baby girl. The flower only blooms under the sun. No explanation. No need to justify or defend. No need for walls, armour or shilds. Just this fragile,  vulnerable,  beautiful petals closing or opening. Easy. Natural. Organic. Somehow it's still winter. I feel the life humming on the inside. In the seed. In the bud. Still waiting for the sun to open me. Freely. Effortlessly. Because it's the right season to bloom under a warm sun. My body knows. My ego tremble. It's so delicate yet so powerful beyond understanding. The journey from deep down in the dark soil. The yearing. The timing. Melting. Growing. Reaching the surface. Opening, growing, stretching naturally towards the sun.

I want a love like that. Never easy. Nature isn't easy. But it follows it's natural, organic laws. Intricate.Delicate. Changing seasons. Weather. Storms. Warmth. Unpredictable. Brutal. Yet steady following the circle of life on the deepest level.

 I need something natural in an unatural world. My feminine being needs to feel the natural response to a masculine man. As natural as the sun and the flower. Seemingly easy, yet magical. So much have to add up. The right weather. The right soil. The right nourishment. The right fertiliser.

I do feel you. I wonder how does it feel for you? When you enter my soft center. Wet. Warm. Welcoming. I do understand the need for urgency. I feel it to. But you deliberately slow down. Urge me, us to feel everything. Even deeper. Beyond the flesh. Breathing into the nervous system. Opening up all those hidden places. In the body. In the mind. In the places no one has been before. When I feel you expanding beyond what's bodily possible. It's both so profound yet so natural. It's creation and co creation beyond words. Natural. Effortlessly. Always following the laws of nature.

When I slow down enough I deeply feel the unnatural speed I'm living in, in my every day life. When I slow down. When I'm in water. When I give myself permission to be. I feel how my whole being is coming back home to myself. Whole. In touch with my natural rhythm. No longer reaching out. Not leaving my center. Holding my boundaries. Not hard or clamping down. Just naturally. My petals is closed. A beautiful bud. Waiting for the right time to bloom under the sun. I'm preparing. The right soil. The right nourishment. Consciously weeding out what's necessary. My own ego. False masculinity. Men that doesn't want commit. My own expectations of what this process should or could be. Resting in the deep knowing of lifes natural cycles and rhythm. It's spring. The seed hums. The bud yearns. Magic is crackling in the air. Life is returning. The sun is melting the soil. I'm so ready to face Him. To let the sun do it's work. To open me. Naturally. Effortlessly. Let Earth recive her King.

Amen.