Eros, sex, chakras and tarot.

They are alive inside of me. The cards gives power, a living image to my chakras. It sounds a bit far out, but it's just art, mirroring my inner subconscious mind and body. I love to draw cards for myself and my masculine counterpart. He is everything from the masculine energy in the world, one particular man, or the "divine " masculine ( every healthy masculine trait) I need to feel the masculine holding, moving, protecting and showing up for me. And he does ( in every man I meet in my everyday life and in the man I adore, my ex, my son and so on)

My roots are my sense of safety in the world. And The World, the archetype, is showing up. Whole, complete, full, rooted. In The Goddess tarot, this is Awakening Aphrodite. Living Eros. My world, my roots, my blood is eros, alive and pulsing. My masculine counterpart ( M c) The beautiful Earth King. King of Pentacles. A mighty tree. He is guardian of the Seed and the dragons are resting at his feet. Forever penetrating all the three realms of reality. The underworld ( roots) The world and the sky. The healthy earthy, materialistic masculine.

My womb isn't exactly guarded but in deep contemplation and meditation, I'm resting with the sword on my body. And Swords ( gift from the masculine) are penetrating my mind and my thoughts. Clear mind. Deep rest. Trusting the timing of life.

My M c, is literally lifting me up. Urging me to build my creation and world. Two of Pentacles are all about union and creating together.

My Solar Plexus, I'm almost screaming at her. The Page of Cups have followed me for years. No matter how much I blend the cards she shows up. She is a true soft, emotional romantic. Enjoying the depth of emotions and feelings. The Sun rays reaching her in her depth. Solar Plexus is: I am. Willpower. The person I'm showing up as in the world. She has been everywhere else than here before. I have to admit, it isn't easy to truly embrace my soft baby girl. But she refuses to disappear. She has come to stay. So here I am. Soft, girly and vulnerable. My M c is actually the mature, steady Queen of Pentacles. Like the king she exists in every realm. Steady, rooted and connected to the sky. I'm grateful for her.

My heart is rebelling or running consciously in the opposite direction. Up for a fight. Five of Wands has been in my solar plexus before but now moving up to my heart. Oh my reckless heart. You can't outrun your destiny. But I'm damn sure trying. My M c is yet again a earthy card. Six of Pentacles. He plays his tune and generously gives his melody to the fertile ground. His seed is growing and it's yet to see what the creation is becoming.

My throat and words are yet a familiar card. Three of Wands. It used to be in my womb. It's bravely stepping into thin air. To let the path appear. To trust so deeply. To know it's possible to find a new way to live and love. To lead the way into a new reality. My M c is the beautiful firey Knight of Wands. Brave, reckless, passionate warrior riding the mighty Lion. He is courageous and aggressive. The ultimate masculine or the slightly immature and young masculine. He is wonderful in his speech but needs to balance it all out with more wisdom and awareness.

My third eye, my intuition. The Empress. Nature. Gaia. The natural world in all it's astonishing beauty. Cycles and seasons. Storms, hurricanes and sunshine and rain. My intuition isn't a flimsy, spiritual imagination. It's deeply rooted in my body, hormones and nervous system. She knows.

My M c , The High Pristest. The witch. Magical and in the realms beyond words and thoughts. In rituals. In rhythm. In songs. And it's now I truly gets the chills. In the Goddess Tarot, they are both connect to the card The World. Remember my roots. Then it dawned on me. It isn't Aphrodite awakened. It's Freya. More than Aphrodite, Freya is both nature and magic. Both Goddess of Life and Death. Love and War. My world, my roots and it isn't the first time Freya is taking her rightful place in my psychic. She knows when I need her. She thought the mighty Odin about magic and how to use the runes. The ultimate creation of masculine and feminine wisdom and insight.

My higher self, the one that knows beyond ego and what's happening around me. The Weel of Fortune. It's been following my for a long time too. I feel it's about patience. To slow down and trust the timing of life. All in due time.

My M c is the wonderful Knight of Swords. High in the air he quite literally see himself from the outside. Brilliantly and slightly recklessly he is mastering the air element aka thoughts and the intellect. He uses his sword precise and correctly. He is fearless, honest and loyal. He is blunt and speaks his mind. Yet again a slightly immature masculine energy. But the Knights has the true gift of the masculine in motion. In a world that dreads to take action, they both dive in, head on. Fire and air. It's blasting and slightly dangerous.

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The day has been busy but in the middle of it, I felt a clear command. You need to be penetrated. You need to feel and hear your own wetness. So I obeyed even when I wasn't too much into it at first. Then I started to breathe into the chakras and the images. The stress melted away. My pussy opened up. I could clearly hear the wet sound of my glass toy sliding in and out of me. I felt the support. The steady generous masculine urging me to stay open. To take it all inn. My orgasm came after quite some time exploring. Slow, deep and good. It's actually my responsibility to continue to stay soft, wet and open. Even in everyday stress. It's a practice. It's a path. Maybe even spiritual. Or at least deep psychological. Rooted in my body. I love the contradiction and the wholeness in feeling into both the young and reckless masculine, in company of the deeply rooted earhly king energy. What a fantastic combination. Brilliant thinking. Passionate and firey words and a steady, rooted body. Mmm yummy. I can dig it.

So yes, to live as the awakened Eros. To let Freya guide me into the mysteries of life and death. To let my mind rest and let my intuition, body and womb lead the way. He is stepping in. With so much love and generosity. Thank you for showing up in my world. Always. Thank you. I love you.